What follows are my summaries of five news items. One of these news stories is from the parody site, The Onion. The other four are real, legitimate news stories. Can you figure out which one is fake without checking the links?

• Parents Reward Children With Weed
  
  Tony and Aaron Carlson of Chandler, Arizona have been arrested on suspicion of possessing marijuana and drug paraphernalia, possessing marijuana with intent to sell it, and contributing to the delinquency of minors. Fairly standard drug busts, actually. What really got the cops' attention, though, is what they've learned about the way that Mr. and Mrs. Chandler had been choosing to spend quality time with their children. Apparently, whenever their sons (ages 11 and 12) deserved rewards for good behavior... you know, doing chores, getting good grades, whatever... Mr. And Mrs. Chandler would burn a joint or two with the boys. Family bonding and all that. It does a family good to spend some time together, just kinda hanging out, smoking a couple of blunts, watching a little TV, whatever. It's all good, ya know?
  
  Pot Parents: Is This Real News Or Not?



• Nude Mexican Cyclists Demand Respect
  
  We live in a car-oriented world and a clothing-oriented world... and some good people in Mexico City, Mexico have simply had enough. On Saturday, dozens of naked people on bicycles rode through the streets of Mexico City, demanding that those who were clothed and in cars treat them with respect. According to a report by the Associated Press, protestors with slogans like "Respect Bike Riders" painted on their bodies, turned heads in a city where it's rare to see even clothed riders due to heavy automobile traffic. Some of the naked cyclists were quick to point out the benefits of their preferred mode of transportation. "We don't pollute," said Felipe Fulop, one of the protest organizers.
  
  Nude Cyclists: Is This Real News Or Not?



• Uri Geller Wants The Pope To Help Him Secure Elvis Presley's Former Home
  
  Noted spoon-bending "psychic" Uri Geller is involved in a legal dispute over ownership of a home once owned by Elvis Presley. Geller claims to have bought Presley's pre-Graceland home on eBay for just over $9,000,000 in May. However, according to Geller, the seller failed to acknowledge his winning bid and, instead, sold the home to the foundation of music producer Mike Curb. Geller had planned to turn the home into an Elvis museum, and now says that he won't rest until the house is legally his: ""There's no doubt in my mind the house is mine. I absolutely believe that. I've sought legal advice on both sides of the Atlantic and if that fails I'll take it to the Supreme Court. Even the Pope!" There has been no word from the Vatican regarding Geller's dispute with eBay.
  
  Uri, Elvis, and the Pope: Is This Real News Or Not?
  
  
  
• Sony Debuts "Steve," Their Model Customer
  
  Who is the ideal Sony target consumer? According to Sony CEO Howard Stringer, it's "Steve," the perfect model of the desired Sony product buyer and user. "By implementing parallel-purchasing solutions and simplifying its personality traits," Stringer says that Sony hopes to solidify their position as the leader and chief innovator in the consumer-electronics marketplace. "We’re introducing a range of cutting-edge consumer attributes that other electronics manufacturers can only dream of,” Stringer continued, elaborating on the way that Sony has zeroed in on the desired features of the ideal consumer. With a wide range of consumer-electronic devices, including televisions and DVD players, home video game consoles and portable game systems, Vaio computers, stereos and video cameras, Sony has become the standard bearer in personal technology. Now, with their focus on the consumer himself, Sony's market dominance is more certain than ever.
  
  Sony Targets Steve: Is This Real News Or Not?



• Woman Attacks Breeder With Dead Chihuahua
  
  A 33 year old woman in St. Peters, Missouri bought a Chihuahua puppy from a local breeder, and took it to a veterinarian for a check-up. Because the puppy was only four weeks old, the vet told it's new owner that the pup was too young to be separated from it's mother and needed to be returned immediately. However, on her way back to the breeder, the puppy died. When she got back to the breeder with the dead puppy, an altercation broke out between the woman and the breeder. The woman fought her way to the basement, where the puppies were, in an attempt to get a new, live puppy. Eventually, the breeder wrestled the angry woman back out of the house, where the woman proceeded to hit the breeder in the head numerous times with the dead puppy. Eventually, the woman drove away, waving the dead Chihuahua puppy out of her sunroof and yelling threats at the breeder. Police said they are considering felony burglary and misdemeanor assault charges against the woman.
  
  Dead Puppy Maniac: Is This Real News Or Not?

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After you've finished and figured out which story is fake, check out Strange Culture, where I first learned about one of the real stories.

And then, if you've got nothing better to do, read my new review of Contact at film geeks.