Here's what happened:


A guy I worked with walked up to another employee and myself while we were taking a break. I'll refer to the guy who approached us as "Co-Employee #1" and I'll refer to the guy I was taking a break with as "Co-Employee #2." I'll refer to me as "Me." Co-Employee #1 had a big smile on his face, and it was apparent that he was coming to share some good news with us while we were on break.


Anyway, Co-Employee #1 walked up to us and said something. Here is what I thought he said:


Co-Employee #1: I'm going to go beat off when I'm done at work this evening.


As you might imagine, I was a little shocked and puzzled by this remark. Off-color remarks and humor certainly aren't foreign in the industrial environment where I work... but saying something like this with an expression of jubilation on his face certainly made Co-Employee #1 seem a bit odd. I wasn't sure what to say in response. Here's the brief conversation that followed:


Me: Uh..... OK?


Co-Employee #1: I can't wait. I'm really looking forward to it.


Me: Alright.


Co-Employee #1: My wife usually takes pictures. I'll bring some with me when I come back to work if you guys want to see them.


Me: Dude, I don't know is this is a joke or what, but I think it's kinda sick.


Co-Employee #1: Oh. Alright.


With that, Co-Employee #1 gave me a puzzled look, as though I'd been rude and behaved strangely, and walked off.


I then had the following exchange with Co-Employee # 2:


Co-Employee #2: What were you so upset about?


Me: I wasn't upset, I just thought what he said was kinda weird.


Co-Employee #2: Why? It sounds to me like he and his wife are going to have a real nice time. I almost wish I could join them.


Me: Uh.... what? What the hell are we talking about, here?


Co-Employee #2: He said that he was going to the beach after he's done at work this evening.


Me: Oh. I think I'll go get a cup of coffee.


I never tracked the other guy down and explained everything to him. I had no idea how to start.


Here's the other miscommunication that took place this weekend:


Our church had a pancake breakfast today (and I've had "St. Alphonso's Pancake Breakfast" in my head all day, as a result)... but because of my work schedule, we didn't have time to attend. So after mass, while the kids were in Sunday School, Wendy and I just dashed down to a local coffee shop to get a cup of coffee.


It was nice outside, so we stepped outside to the tables and chairs at the front of the coffee shop.


There was a newspaper machine in that area, with a sign on it... an advertisement for the local newspaper's classified ads. I'll try to duplicate the sign here, right down to the size of the letters, the color of the fonts, etc:

Argh!


Frustrated With Your Job?


Check our classifieds!

From where I was sitting, a corner of the table was just slightly "cutting through" the ad and blocking the bottom part of the g and the h in the expletive "Argh!"


Because of the way that small parts of those letters were hidden, from my perspective, the sign appeared to say:

Arab!


Frustrated With Your Job?


Check our classifieds!

So there I sat, drinking my coffee and thinking "What the $%%#??"


I had a good laugh once I walked around the table and saw what it actually said.


Those are my stories, I'm sticking to them.

Permalink -- Posted by Darrell at 13:10