McFat Five, the latest from MCF:

1) I’m not on DVD, and I may never be on DVD as much as you wish I was. What am I?

Dude, if you'd asked me this question a year or so ago, I could have answered it repeatedly. For ages I refused to buy Goodfellas or Unforgiven (my favorite film) because the DVD versions were paltry. Finally, decent and fully-loaded versions came out, and I own them both. The best answer to the question, however, would have been Mike Leigh's outstanding film Naked, which wasn't out on DVD for this region AT ALL. Then, a really nice two-disc set was released on September 20th of last year. Finally! This is a great movie, but it's very heavy. Like a kick to the gut. Watch it with caution.

Last minute update:

I just remembered an extremely funny britcom that used to run on the BBC: People Like Us. That show used to make me laugh until I was in physical pain. I wish it were on DVD, but it isn't. And, on top of that, I haven't even been able to find it in reruns on TV in ages. If you've ever seen the show, you know it's one of the funniest britcoms ever, and that it's absence on DVD is a tragic. The episode about the photographer made me laugh until tears were literally streaming down my face.

2) It’s going to be cold and gray for some months to come. There are no good movies playing. You don’t want to venture far or spend a lot of money, but sometimes the four walls of your home conspire to drive you mad and you just need to go SOMEWHERE. What do you do?

Used CD stores are like a home-away-from-home for me.

3) If you had to give up one of your senses, which would it be?

I guess my sense of smell. I wouldn't want to lose my sight or hearing for all the obvious reasons... and I imagine that just getting around would be impossible without my sense of touch. I love to eat, so I have to keep my sense of taste. I can't think of a single smell that I love so much that I can't imagine living without it... so I guess smell can go.

Do I have the option of giving up my sense of common decency?

4) This sitcom will NEVER be made into a major motion picture, not in a million years. Then again, it wouldn’t be that unprecedented. What’s the WORST case scenario, from sitcom choice to casting, that you could imagine?

5) Now you’re a supervillain. Why? What has motivated you to use your powers for evil, what are your powers, and what are your methods and goals?

The best supervillains aren't really intentionally using their powers for evil. The best ones see themselves as the good guys. Think Venom. Think Magneto. Maybe even the Punisher... although I guess we're crossing over into anti-hero turf with him. Anyway, the ones with a chip on their shoulder... the ones who see themselves as doing right...those are the ones I like. The supervillains who want to take over the world bore me. The ones who see themselves as stuck in a "me-against-the-world" predicament are the ones I really enjoy. I guess if I were a supervillain, it would be because I was trying to bring down corruption but going about it badly. Maybe I'd be LaborMan, a supervillain who traps and illegally imprisons corrupt union bosses because I don't think that the system will ever actually bring them to justice.

6) Name one artist, in any discipline, who has affected your life in some way.

I literally thank God for the artistic mastery of guitarist Tony Rice every time I hear him play.